Gay father’s delight: ‘Dad, thank you for inspiring me’

76 CRIMES

A Father’s Day blessing

Maurice Tomlinson is delighted by his son's letter of thanks. (Photo courtesy of Facebook) Maurice Tomlinson is delighted by his son’s letter of thanks. (Photo courtesy of Facebook)

Growing up in the Christian fundamentalist society of Jamaica, I believed in my church’s teaching that I could be cured of my homosexuality by simply marrying a woman. I therefore married my best female friend who knew about my sexual orientation, but like me, she also believed in a “gay-cure.”

As expected, this failed miserably, and after four years I left the marriage when I realized that I could no longer be authentically intimate with my now ex-wife. However, we were blessed with a wonderful son, currently age 14, whom we both love dearly.

He lives with his mother in the Caribbean and I have not seen him in over three years. He and I have never spoken directly about my homosexuality or my same-gender marriage because I always thought that he…

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Angelic Tales – Theatre Royal Stratford East

These lovely people have reviewed my short play 🙂

The LGBTQ Arts Review

New Writing Festival by Team Angelica

Short and Curlies

(Thursday 4th June – This event has now closed.)

This was an exciting evening of new writing covering four twenty minute plays. The first; “Girlfag” was written by Rita Suszek and directed by Rikki Beadle-Blair. This play is by turns touching, funny and confronting. It deals with the intertwining and confusing issues of gender, sexuality and identity. It is something of a journey of self-discovery.

The main character, Raw – played by Suszek herself, searches for the answers to questions that plague so many of us such as what, and who, do we really want. In a world that is finally becoming more accepting of the myriad different identities and desires that can be a part of the human condition, it can come as a surprise how often we are expected to fit ourselves into a certain set of definitions. The…

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The truth behind my lion selfie

According to Jess

As I apprehensively shuffled into the caged box, my gut clenched and my heart stopped…I immediately knew that I was in a bad place, and I desperately wanted to run straight back out and find comfort in my friends hiding out in the car.

But something stronger told me to carry on, something told me that by enduring the next hour in this awful place I could find hope to make a positive change to the hell that I currently found myself encased in.

After an hour of enduring the heartbreaking pain of filming undercover, I spent the next hour crying and shaking at what I had seen. I was both so angry and upset that I couldn’t decide between having an emotional breakdown and marching straight back into the building to punch the guy in the face. And that’s when I decided that I could try my absolute hardest…

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My Play Will Be Performed Tomorrow!

“You are your commitments. You are what you consistently do. That is your life. That is your story: The things you kept doing no matter what. The things you did anyway. Choose your addictions don’t let them choose you. Choose what and who you attract. Choose your values. Choose your own price. Choose your beauty. Choose your creativity. Choose humanity. Choose your nickname. Chose your brand. Choose your legacy. Choose your life.”

Rikki Beadle-Blair

Some of you will know that it’s been all about that play, recently. And now the plans are coming to fruition…. yes, tomorrow is the big day.

I am happy. When I strip down the trappings of anxiety and what-iffing, I am truly, deeply happy. And peaceful. This is what I want to do in the world. I’m doing it. I feel full of love.

Now, at 28 – having written this play – I know that nothing happens overnight. That’s the beauty. Now I know and believe in small victories leading to large ones, which leads me to believe in myself – the girl who gets up for her morning run and making music (and recently recorded an album); who’s been swimming for over two months now; the girl who, occasional slip-up non-withstanding, eats healthy; the girl with a temper who learns how to meditate herself out of anxiety and resulting anger. This girl. Who is not always a girl. But whatever. This person. Me.

I believe in me. I earned it. I earned the faith and the peace. It doesn’t mean I am mistake-proof or fuck-up proof – it doesn’t mean my confidence is all-encompassing. It does mean I am taking responsibility for all my actions and reactions, for what I do, what I think, say to others, say to myself.

So once all that is said, done, established, I am free. Free from pretending I’m shy about my work – free to feel vulnerable when I do, free to be happy, tearful, beautiful, amazed by beauty. I am free. It’s an incredible feeling.

Did I do everything right? Oh hell no.

Will I let it stop me? Hell no, squared.

Am I ready to rock’n’roll?

HELL YEAH!!!!

As you can see – in rehearsal:

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